Lady Genevieve’s Sexy Scoop on National Oral Sex Day

Happy National Sex Day and Pride Month!!  And with National Sex Day falling on June 9th (6/9), I figured I go oral this entry!  Cunnilingus (aka “eating” out/vagina), fellatio (blow job), and anilingus (rim job for those not so well versed in technical terms) are sometimes the best “just because” gifts someone would ever ask for/receive.  In my opinion, and solely mine, I think sometimes I prefer just to have any type of oral sex performed on me rather than have any other type of sexual activity – probably because it is a little selfish and I just sit back and enjoy it but sometimes I need to indulge.  I’d happily oblige to my partner as well if asked (or not, so long as we have our consent arranged).  In fact, last year when the Men’s World Cup was happening, I made a wager with Lance about who would win and our prize would be undisrupted oral of our choosing – and for the record, I won.

Don’t get me wrong! I am very familiar with and personally know some people who are uncomfortable with or dislike oral – whether it be their gag reflex, the taste of skin, or a traumatic experience they had while giving/receiving in their past.  If you absolute dislike oral, this blog is not going to be for you – I’m not going to try to force you to retry something you absolutely despise.  This is more for those who want to feel more comfortable, give oral a second try, or just want to make their experience more interesting or enjoyable!

I’ll start with the small stuff – easy to integrate into your life without sucking your wallet dry (you’ll see why this is a terrible pun, just you wait).  Full disclosure, I have a sturdy IUD and not that I can’t use condoms (unless with a new partner or something), but if I do, it would render my data invalid so I’m not trying to do that.  I did, however, decide to take one for the team (kind of) and have a taste of the Trustex flavored latex condoms we sell in store.  I can assure you that we only sell legit condoms – not those novelty ones that would fail the moment you open them up from their packing.  The one flavor I decided to try was cola.  I’ve had my share of awful tasted fruit condoms in my past so cola seemed to be the better option and I can honestly say I was pleasantly surprised.  Trustex has several fun flavors: strawberry, vanilla, chocolate, banana, grape, and of course, cola! Fun yet VERY important fact: flavored condoms are to be used for the purpose of oral sex ONLY!  Because spermicide tastes awful, they won’t include in with flavor condoms so that’s why they are NOT intended to be used during PIV intercourse.

Pipedream developed their Comfortably Numb oral sex mints and I think they’re actually appropriately named!  I’ve had the cinnamon and the mint (tastes like mint chocolate chip – yummy!) and, unlike many of the oral sex gel’s I’ve tasted recently, I was very happy to have my expectations met on delicious flavoring.  My primary goal when I first tried these was to get my mouth totally numb (because sometimes I just don’t think to read the instructions which SPECIFICALLY STATE to only use 2 max a day… oops).  I can report that I did not have any adverse effects and even with 4 in my mouth at the same time, I could talk normal, but I still recommend following the directions.  Oddly enough, when I only used 2, I felt like it had the stringer effect and lasted longer.  Speaking on length of time, these had my throat and back of my tongue “comfortably numb” for about 5 minutes each time, give or take.  I feel like it might be too short of time depending on the end goal with oral (fore play vs. only engaging in oral), so you may want to only use these if you aren’t planning on sitting on your knees …or back or whatever Twister position you people like to use for a while.  I would definitely buy these on the regular and I think these is enough different flavors for everyone to enjoy!

Pipedream decided to also develop a product to spice up blowjobs with a candy called BJ Blast!  Essentially, this little packet of candy is just grinded down pop rocks candy (ya know, so it doesn’t hurt).  I’m not sure if this is a joke or not, but it’s only 69 calories per packet (LOL).  Lance was the bigger judge on this and stated it was okay but not really that fun, but this could also be from the fact that Lance would need more of a stronger “vibration” to enjoy.  Also, I was definitely nervous I was gonna choke on the candy so our mind kind of skipped out on enjoyment and more into cautious until dissolved/I chewed up.  Tasted great though and I ate the rest of it afterward!  This is something worth a try, but I might also recommend using honey or whipped cream or something else if you wanted to spice things up using food.  This would be more of a fun gag gift.

Speaking of other products that would spice up your experience, Doc Johnson also dabbles in oral sex toys and edible products and numbing sprays. Let me start with their Good Head line – I tried the mint and cinnamon again (there is also 3 more fruity flavors if you would prefer) with similar expectations to the CG line I recently tried – just soapy.  Sadly, the mint fell into this category, but did not leave a bad aftertaste so after the initial ingestion it wasn’t so bad.  The cinnamon wasn’t terribly strong (my mind was thinking more that it would be Altoids strong), but did have enough of a flavor to potentially mask the taste of skin: full disclosure I don’t mind the taste of skin during oral so I just kind of drink??? these to see if I like them with occasionally throwing them on a finger (shoulder shrug).  They’re okay, but not sure I would go out of my way to use these again.

Doc Johnson has a couple of varieties of numbing sprays – I happened to use their Good Head Deep Throat To-Go oral anesthetic spray in mint (if you can’t tell by now, mint and cinnamon are some of my favorite flavors).  I sprayed it directly to the back of my throat and tested it out.  Granted, I don’t have much of a gag-reflex as is EXCEPT for when brushing my teeth so I used my tooth brush to help test this one out.  It worked far better than the mints in my opinion (about 7 minutes give or take), but not without somewhat of a bad after taste.  It does boast to help with dry mouth and to freshen breath, but with the numbing effect it is hard to tell and I forget to check once I’m no longer numb.  I would say this isn’t too bad of a product to give a try and if anything, has this “off brand” use to it so even if you don’t use it for oral, keep it to freshen things up for other stuff.

My final product – and this time I did save the BEST for last – is the Hott Products Wet Dreams Tongue Pleasure Tongue Vibe (I know, like a tongue twister for a tongue twister).  This guy we had to try out about 6 or so times because they really don’t have instructions on whom this would work best on and how you should have the mouthpiece.  It doesn’t indicate what kind of material it is (definitely not silicone), but it’s exactly the same as many moth pieces you would find while playing sports, maybe a little more pliable since you don’t have to actually protect your teeth from getting damaged… or I hope you wouldn’t.  It has a little vibe (similar to ones you seen on cockrings) and isn’t big vibe strong, but pretty powerful for it’s size – I mean, you don’t need your partners head vibrating so much they get dizzy or their teeth are clattering so much they chip!  So, Lance and I discovered that under the tongue/bottom teeth placement seemed the most appropriate for holding on and usages with his tongue on me.  For blowjobs, it was pretty similar but I could also hold on with the top, but you cant do to much extreme moments when using on a penis.  Anally, this would work great on anyone!  We, and by we I mean honestly me, enjoyed this guy a LOT and I’m ready to make a bet again on this year’s World Cup with absolutely confidence.  It comes with a flavor gel and BELIEVE IT OR NOT tasted AMAZING.  Lance and I we’re fighting over who was gonna eat it.  We go Baileys and Cream, but they come with several other alcohol themed flavors (also separate packets in our store as well).  We are definitely holding onto this toy as well going back for more of the liquor lube packets.  I would highly recommend this little guy!

I really enjoy writing about oral for a couple of reasons: oral is great for queer or straight couples as well for random hook-ups and friends with benefits (if you’re fortunate enough to find someone like that) and because you couple use all the change you find in your couch to come out and purchase these items.  They’re inexpensive and if you end up not liking them, you didn’t break the bank to purchase them.  Plus, a a lot of what I mentioned eventually does run out so you don’t want to spend a whole lot on something that will run out or expire.  If you’re into any type of oral or want to give it a try, I would recommend trying any of what I mentioned (even the stuff I didn’t personally like), but again, these are my opinions.

Stay Sexual!!

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