Ways to Stroke Their Ego

Ways to appreciate your penis-owner partner by stroking their ego and more in the bedroom!

People have a natural desire to want to make their partners feel good, not only mentally, but also physically. Aside from taking time from our busy schedules and life to make time for one another, we should stroke our partner’s ego and find time to learn how to pleasure them in the bedroom. Here are some sex tips for pleasure:

Ego Stroking Statements Your Partner Should Hear

Blow Each Other Away
Blow Each Other Away

Each partner in the relationship needs to know how much they are loved and respected. Who doesn’t want to hear how amazing and wonderful they are? Yes, we all want our ego stroked from time to time. Egos aren’t necessarily a bad thing, they are the parts of us we feel most confident about. When we feel confident about ourselves, we make better lovers. Those egos need to be stroked and when you are in a relationship, you have to make sure that they feel like they’re number one in your book. Whether it’s their intelligence, physical appearance, sexual performance or the way they treat you, you should always make time to ensure they knows how you feel. You shouldn’t be complimenting them 24/7/365, but an effort should be made often. Efforts can be as simple as texting while on lunch break during the day – just letting them know that you are thinking about them during your day.

Find a way to genuinely compliment them, even on something that seems small – it can be huge that you noticed! They may say ‘it’s no big deal’ or shrug it off, but deep down it may be appreciated. Any and all compliments that you give him should be true and really come from the heart. Try complimenting your partner on the things that keep you attracted to them.

So when those moments arrive, hearing these simple words might just be the boost we need:

Things they want to hear:

  • “You make me feel safe”
  • “I trust you”
  • “I love the person you are”
  • “You are an amazing lover”
  • “Damn, you are so sexy” / “Baby, you look so good!”
  • “I wouldn’t want to live my life with anyone else”
  • “You make me feel like I can do anything”

Find Out How They Like to be Touched

It is mistaken that a penis is a sensitive orgasm like a clitoris, so partners don’t use much pressure when they masturbate it. But a penis is built for a harder grip, and a penis-owner will appreciate it if you treat it firmly. The best way to know what your partner likes is to ask them and then to check that you’re doing it right.

Start off gentle using a light, feathery touch with well-lubed fingers (use your saliva if nothing else is at hand), gently running all over the penis shaft, their balls and especially the head of the penis. This can be exquisite, but at some point, if you’re going to masturbate them to orgasm, they may start making signs (like thrusting their hips, or moaning – pay close attention for those cues!) which mean they’re ready for you to switch to a harder stroke to bring them to orgasm. Remember, too, that as they near ejaculation, your stimulation will be more satisfying when you focus on the head of their penis rather than anywhere else.

Give the Perfect Hand or Blow Job

M for Men Snatch Stroker

Use Lubrication. Lubricate those hands of yours! No penis-owner wants your bone dry palms moving up and down their penis. It causes friction and it hurts. You can use your own saliva, but it dries up quickly so we recommend using a good lubricant before starting.

Get Comfortable & Decide on your Best Hand. Determine which is your best hand (though at times, you’ll be using both) and position yourself accordingly. Spice things up by selecting an alternative hand job positions which may include: them standing in front of you while you sit on the bed, you lying on your back while they straddle your stomach, and you nestling between their legs, facing them.

Get a Grip. Hold that penis as though your holding an aluminum drink can: With medium pressure. Not too hard (you don’t want to crush him), but not too gentle (you don’t want him to think you’re not loving it). Use a sleeve or stroker for heightened sensations. You can find some fail proof tips on giving the perfect hand job below or grab one of our top selling oral books – Blow Each Other Away – with even more tips and trickles for your penis-owner partner’s pleasure:

1. “The OK“: This is a very basic technique, but is great for those just beginning to learn how to perfect the handjob or for those still learning their new partners. You make your hands with the “OK” sign with your fingers and travel up and down the shaft adjusting pressure as needed.

2. “The Love Tunnel”: When you’re ready to increase pressure, you’ll next want to work your hands in a hand-over-hand rhythm. So as soon as one of your hands caresses the head of the penis, the next one is already making its way up their shaft allowing for constant stimulation

3. “The Gummer“: Another tip for beginners -the gummer will protect the shaft from bumping into teeth and allow you to adjust pressure easily. You just wrap your lips over your teeth and voila!

4. Don’t forget their balls: It may not be enough to get them off, but they are sensitive and provide another pleasurable sensation for them to experience.

5. Do both!: If you’re looking to overload your partner or finish the deed, sucking on the head of the penis while stoking their shaft will let them experience an explosion of sensations.

Masturbating Him: Do’s & Don’ts

Masturbating your partner can be a great way to spice up your sex life. You could use it as foreplay, but you can also make them have a complete orgasm with a hand-job.

Do . . .

Build up slowly. Take your time to set the right mood. This is a good time to talk dirty or stroke stroke ego. Avoid grabbing their crotch right away. Instead, start gradually by kissing, massaging and touching them with clothes on. Once the mood is sensual and passionate, undress them and pay attention to everything down there.

Get your grip right. Grab their penis not too gently, neither too firmly with your hand. Start moving your hand up and down in a rhythmic motion. Be aware that grabbing the head of the penis can be too sensitive, especially at first. If they’re circumcised, the head of their penis is likely to be less sensitive.

Get the pace right. Pay attention to the speed at which your hand is moving. You can start slowly and then gather speed as they near climax. On the other hand, if they’re really turned on, you can slow right down as orgasm approaches and teasingly hold the tension as you build to a big explosion. This depends on the person and the moment. If they’re having trouble climaxing it will be frustrating if you keep it too slow and gentle. But if they’re ready to burst, going too fast will feel like you’re rushing it and wasting the moment. Watch them closely, follow their movements – or just ask!

Once they starts ejaculating, hold your hand steady or slow right down. The head of the penis is very sensitive when they cum and too much action around it while having an orgasm could make it painful. And oh…don’t forget to maintain sexy eye contact all along.

Make it wet. Wetter is always better, so you may want to use a lube. Just squeeze some of it on the penis before you start off. You could also just spit some saliva (which is a natural lubricant) on your palm before you rub their penis. As they gets more turned on, a little pre-cum will make the head of their penis nice and slippery.

Explore toys together. Toys are there to build intimacy and help with arousal for both parties – and they are NOT replacements for you or your partner.

DON’T . . .

Dr. Joel Kaplan Silicone Prostate Massager

Be afraid of exploring. Your partner will be delighted if you take the initiative to explore their body. Don’t hold yourself back from doing something that you’re afraid they won’t like. Go ahead and experiment. Be sure to read their body language to check if they really like it or not. If they moan with delight, you’ll know it worked! And… if you’re really unsure, you can also just ask what they’d like you to do next.

Ignore the rest of his accessories.  Remember a penis-owner can also get excited when you sensually touch their testicles. While you’re holding their penis with one hand, try cupping their testicles with the other or stroking them gently with your fingers. You could also use your tongue to stimulate them. The perineum, a piece of tissue that connects testicles to his anus (aka the taint), is also an erogenous spot. You can gently press the perineum while giving your partner a hand-job, especially just before they’re about to cum. If your partner likes it, you could also grab their butt and stroke their anus, slip a finger inside, or use a prostate massager or an anal plug. Use some saliva or lubricant to make your finger wet first and go gently.

Use just one action.  A hand-job doesn’t have to involve one boring action. You can use a few techniques to spice it up and make it more pleasurable for your partner. Apart from holding their penis entirely in your hand, you can use other kinds of grips to intensify their pleasure. You can make a circle with your thumb and index finger and rub the penis from the bottom to the head. You may also use both hands at once and move them in one direction or in opposite directions.

Look uninterested. Nothing will ruin the moment quicker than looking like you are miserable. Show him you’re loving it too and that’ll double their pleasure!

This post was originally published February 13, 2016. It was updated May 2022 to reflect new products and information.

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